time for me to process!
Well, well, well, hello to all of you non-cliff note version people...grab some popcorn or a cup of tea and settle in for the extended version, I’m just going to start typing and see what comes out but I’m going to warn you this is going to be longer than normal...loveya.
Typically every 6 months, consultants will come into the tribe and do an evaluation on where you are at in your understanding of the culture and language of the people group you are living in. It is a chance to assess your level, to see where you may be stuck, give pointers and encouragement. I shared with you guys this image before, but this is a breakdown of the five stages of language learning…
When someone arrives at the level of Capable High, you are released from formal language study to start diving into things like literacy, lesson writing, etc with the hopes that these will help push your language ability into proficiency by the time you start doing more formal teaching and translation. In October, at my first eval I was at Progressing High and yet I knew these last 3 levels would be the hardest to ‘jump’, sometimes taking people a year or more to get through them.
After going on a break in January, I decided to buckle down and to be as disciplined as I could in those last 4 months leading up to my evaluation. I deleted any apps on my phone that could be a distraction, set a pretty regimented schedule for myself and I prayed...a lot, I asked for prayer (which many of you did!!), I cried out of frustration, out of my not enoughness and maybe even out of fear that I would never get it, and yet God continued to get me up, encourage me and get me out the door and at the end of the day, I had reached Capable High at the end of May. Only the Lord. I remember in training being told I should prepare myself that I may never be able to learn a tribal language, that the older you get the harder it is and those words have stuck with me and been this voice in the back of my head always causing me to doubt if I could do it. However, while going through the eval it honestly felt like an outer body experience as I was communicating and then listened as the Bisorios communicated back what I had said in the National Language. I kept thinking, “oh my gosh, they are saying exactly what is on this paper...how are they doing this? do they all of a sudden know English, did they read what is on this paper somehow? How are they saying this so perfectly?” haha. Jokes on me, God was giving me the ability to communicate! ONLY THE LORD.
WHAT DOES A CULTURE + LANGUAGE EVALUATION ENTAIL?
The way an evaluation works is this… The evaluators are missionaries who are also church planters themselves and have been trained as language consultants for the field. They do not know the Bisorio language but they have a variety of tasks for you to complete and their job is to try to push you to your breaking point where you can no longer communicate and that’s when they know what level you’re at.
The consultant will ask me to share about certain things within culture, tell stories about things we have done together, and then they will have me explain things outside their sphere of knowledge to see how and if I am able to communicate...for example I had to describe an elevator - what it is and how it works (something they have never seen or heard of) and then I had to describe Antartica and eskimos and igloos. I was also tested on how well I can ‘on the spot’ translate and communicate more scientific information. In each of these instances, I first communicate in the Bisiorio Language and then the Bisorios have to communicate back to the consultant in the national language and then the consultant is able to ask clarifying questions if needed.
There are also several portions of the eval where the Bisorios and the consultant discuss a story or situation without me knowing and then the Bisorios communicate to me in Bisorio and I have to tell the language consultant what they said. There is a huge portion of grammar points where there are these short sentences that I have to communicate to see if I have an understanding of more difficult discourse level features like “I would have...if you had...” or “You should...” or “He has to...” , etc
All and all we were together over 4.5 hours going back and forth and at the end all our brains WERE FRIED but I was so in awe of how the Lord gave each of us strength to get through each task. On top of this I have compiled 60 pages of a discourse notebook outlining the discourse features of this language, 38 pages of combined culture findings and 10 pages detailing the major themes impacting their culture today and Biblically how we as a team plan to continue to address and communicate truth in the midst. This is work I have been working on collectively these last 15 months and in March also spent time with my co-workers developing a deeper understanding from the early years here.
I could not have done this without the day in and day out help from the Bisorios who were always available and willing to help me, especially my four main language helpers (Selista, Ana, Frida, Marda) and Ana’s husband, Saimone. The whole village has been praying and believing Jesus to help me. Seeing their desire for me to get the language and their desire to grow deeper in Christ was such motivation for me to keep going. And then there was my team, the Kennells and the Walkers who were always willing to meet with me and help me navigate things that would have taken me months to figure out. They cheered me on from afar and I feel so lucky to have them. AND THEN THERE IS YOU. From all over the world, you have encouraged, sent cards, emails, prayers and partnered with me, believing in Christ in me to strengthen me and this fueled me so much.
SIDE NOTE: To add to the stress of the evaluation and the pressure you feel as one is coming, our village flooded days before the consultants were to arrive, which changed our plans from having the consultants come into Bisorio to me bringing a crew of Bisorios out to town. This meant I had to select the right crew to come and prep them, rearrange flights, pack for the time being in town for Interface, board up our houses, get everyone weighed up and get to town within about 30 hours. Then the morning of our flight at 5am we headed to the airstrip close to us which is down river about 4 hours and when we got there I saw that the water was just starting to come on top of their airstrip and sure enough the plane circled but wouldn’t land with the water on the airstrip so we quickly jumped back in the boat and raced another 4 hours to the next airstrip as the pilot said he could only wait until about 1:30pm for us before having to take off. We made it and got to town!! And I was so thankful for our pilot and his willingness to wait!! And I cannot tell you what a relief that was. I loved seeing all but 1 of Bisorios experience town for the first time. So many firsts from how to open a car door to how to use a toilet, new foods, seeing roads and stores and the ocean!...
OH and the pilot dropping the plane mid-flight... the Bisorios have laughed and replayed this video over and over more times than I can count!! Haha. I love this crew so much and am so grateful them.
Each year 30 some students from all over the world come over to PNG to learn more about what it takes to plant a church and translate the Bible amidst a people group that has never heard about Jesus or had access to the Word of God in their language. There are over 100 class hours and close to 40 hours of time learning the national language, being out in villages/learning culture or connecting with the Ramu Valley Academy Students. Meals are spent in deep discussions jumping off of things discussed in the classroom and I love how these men and women genuinely desire to process how the Lord may be wanting to use their life to make His name known. In the midst there is lots of laughter and adventuring and sweet friendships made.
This year was extra special for a few reasons…
A former student, Kait, came back to support the team through discipleship and being a helping hand wherever needed. It was one of the biggest blessings to share a house with her and have a dear friend in PNG to do life with. Three programs ago we were strangers, then fast friends and now she has been one of the most supportive, intentional, consistent senders from the US these last few years. She came to serve and yet the Lord was also doing a lot in her heart and we will see where this eventually leads her someday! It was the biggest gift to process with her and have her be a part of the program this year. God’s gift to me.
I brought out two young girls from Bisorio to be a part! They helped in a number of ways from peeling vegetables to sweeping to helping students with language but also allowed me the opportunity to keep speaking Bisorio each day. My hope that it was life on life discipleship outside their context. I loved how they made friends with the students of Ramu Valley Academy and were pushed to use and strengthen their knowledge of the National Language. I loved watching them eat meals and worship alongside the students and the joy they had every day trying new things. Also that they wanted matching outfits and jumped on the trampoline made me smile.
I was reminded once again of the kindness of the Lord to give me the opportunity to serve Him doing something I love so much. I know I’ve probably said this the last few years...but I thought in coming to PNG, I was letting go of huge parts of ministry that I love. From teaching and communicating God’s Word in my own language, working with the next generation, discipleship, depths of conversations, planning and organizing events/schedules, etc...and even though it’s at a different scale than it once was, I just feel so in awe of how God knows me and gives me the opportunity to serve Him in this capacity while here in PNG.
I can easily forget how God knows me so well and that it is out of His kindness and love for me that gives me these opportunities. I hate that I forget, I hate that I doubt His love, but in hard moments that seem to last longer than I wish, it feels as if He has forgotten me. And yet as I type this, I am reminded once again of the kindness of the Lord and the little gifts that He lavishes consistently upon me that He doesn’t have to give. Interface is that and the friendships, community it brings is that.
AND on top of that, He allows me to be a part of such an incredible team. Every year Janie, Mark and Holly from the US, as well as, a team of missionaries here in country come together to make this thing happen. Every year God pulls together a team with such unique giftings crafted for that year of students and it is so sweet to be a part of it. Mark and Holly understand my world on a level few do, they are people I feel safe to be vulnerable with and know I will be met with compassion, truth, love and support and so working alongside of them and this team is so life-giving.
For one of the weeks, I got to bring a team of students into Bisorio and see it through their eyes. The Bisorios spent days teaching them the way of life here from shooting bows and arrows to eating saksak/taro to panning for gold to cutting down raw jungle and harvesting/planting taro to fishing...many adventures were had. The elders shared testimonies of what their lives were like before the gospel and how it has changed having God’s Word and how they continue to desire to grow. They showed humility in communicating areas of weakness but proclaimed the Gospel and the power of God’s Word so beautifully. They said things to the students about me that I had never heard them say which deeply encouraged me. Then on the day we were leaving one of the elders got up and said, “We have showed you our way of life and how we live here. We made for each of you what we use to fish but all these things are for our physical bodies, but this isn’t what gives us life...” Then he held up the Bible with the New Testament and portions of the Old Testament and said, “This is what sustains us, this is what gives us life and has changed us. And if God had not sent the Kennells and Walkers all those years ago, you would not have been able to come here this week. We wouldn’t have allowed it, we may have even tried to kill you. But now, we can eat together and live as brothers and sisters because of the truth found in God’s Word. We have taken this talk to all our villages who speak Bisorio but there are still many who do not have God’s Word, we can’t take it to them, but will you go?” He then proceeded to give everyone a Bisorio Bible to take home, to remember and to tell others. It was a powerful moment for all of us recognizing what God’s Word has done in the lives of the Bisorios and yet that there are many people still living without this hope.
It was a sweet, beautiful, sweaty, crazy week of all of us living on top of each other in our tiny houses, experiencing how an 8 hour boat trip isn’t as exciting to live out as it is in theory, laughing hard, worshiping Jesus into the night and even though most of the girls got a 24 hour stomach bug that was pretty nasty, it didn’t dampen the trip and it will forever be a week none of us will ever forget.
OH - Here is a video we made with the students of Ramu Valley Academy…just for fun! ENJOY :)
[First, are you still with me? Feel free to take a break if you need to ;) ]
In my last update, I mentioned some guys wanted to come over to help with the airstrip the Bisorios had started clearing land for and if anyone wanted to be a part of making that happen, let me know. OH, the body of Christ! So grateful for each person who responded and for my main sending churches (Arbor Road, Well Kingsburg + especially the Hume Community!!). You all gave generously and we were able to cover their flights to PNG, food, 4 chainsaws and supplies. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
So much can go wrong on a trip like this and there are so many factors BUT all said and done, I am so grateful for all that the Lord did. Our first day had the most intense heat and then God sent the clouds...it made for rough conditions working through downpours and the humidity but we all agreed it was easier than the blazing sun that sucks the life out of you like we had the first day.
It takes a special person to come over here and to be willing to serve in this capacity. It’s hard work, the conditions are not ideal, there are language barriers and situations culturally that you have to adapt to but I honestly could not have asked for a better group of guys. I had the privilege of working with these 4 while at Hume Lake and they feel more like brothers than friends. There was a moment on the second or third day where it just felt so normal that they were here. It’s like I forgot we were in PNG. So much life has been shared between us through the years and it just felt so normal. Dallas, amidst working and chainsawing, had his crew of kids collecting “umalas” (a particular bug that is only found in sepik jungle of PNG). And in the afternoons, he would send up his drone and capture the most epic pictures while teaching the Bisorios how to fly it. Tim provided an incredible amount of wisdom and knowledge for this work while daily (hourly) cleaning, fixing, keeping all the saws in working order while also training up a Bisorio man to continue the work. Lucas made friends with the Bisorios and jumped in, working in partnership with them to problem solve and tackle each new tree. Derek was steady and each day was the first one out there and usually one of the last to leave while building a significant relationship with Nathan who goes to a school in another village and knows some English.
They worked hard while not being very comfortable and did it in tandem with the Bisorios. Each day working all day in clothes that were wet from sweat and rain, bent over holding heavy chainsaws with a smile.
There are many reasons myself, my team and the Bisorios desire for an airstrip to be here and these guys coming helps to make that a reality sooner than later, but to be honest, as I have reflected on their trip and how they exhibited Christ in the way they loved, served, worked, laughed, engaged, I have come to believe that that was the bigger win for me. The Bisorios met brothers in Christ that reflected the heart of the Savior and that is priceless.
With all the sweetness, there is always something going on beneath the surface. A village that is about 2 hours down river has sent a letter claiming the land that we are building the airstrip on actually belongs to them and so begins a land dispute over this ground. I stopped by there to let them know when the Kennells arrive in September we will address this, but will you pray that this does not ignite a fight between our people groups? That the Lord would go before this and that it can be settled apart from the incredible amount of money they are demanding? The Lord can settle this. We pray He gives us wisdom in the process. For now the Bisorios are still working diligently every day. They have another 100 meters they are working to clear at the far end and then will begin digging the 4’ deep, 1 meter wide ditches along both sides of the landing strip for the full 800 meters. Once these are dug and the ground has 3 months to drain/dry out, we will fly in the inspector again to test the ground and give wisdom for next steps.
side note:
After all that crazy work, I came out to town with the team. And because it was my birthday :) we ended up going to an island that belongs to friends of ours. It was the sweetest day reading birthday cards they had brought over, swimming in crystal blue water, eating a PNG Charcuterie lunch and enjoying sweet friendships (I just wish their wives were here!!!) This whole day felt like a dream.
The day I arrived last week, a dear friend of mine’s baby died that I had been trying to care for. I have been visiting and grieving with her while finding time to go around and see some friends while also taking the time to deep clean my house and my co-workers house, to organize and get settled, to rest, reflect and seek the Lord in His Word. I’m tired. It is a level of exhaustion I haven’t felt sense moving here. And to be honest, I didn’t feel ready to come back in and I realize this may be because I have been going probably 60+ hours a week since January and I think I just need a minute. A minute to pause and celebrate all that God has done, to sit in the ways God continues to ask me to sacrifice and trust His sufficiency and to find joy in Him alone. Also a minute to prepare for all that is on the horizon!! And praise the Lord, each day I am feeling a little more like myself.
On Sunday, I met with the elders and we wrote up all the areas of ministry we could dive into and I am taking time to talk to my team and other missionaries about the best course of action moving forward. What I am doing is a little out of the box and not the normal road new missionaries walk so there really isn’t a formula of what the next steps are. And so I depend on the Lord, the village elders, my teammates and the wisdom of other missionaries to discern what is the best course of action to move forward. I pray that somehow God collectively brings all these thoughts into harmony and unity with each other. I look forward to sharing as He does!!
Ok. That’s a lot. There may only be a handful of people that made it to the end of this update...or let’s be honest, it’s probably just my mom (hi mom), but I felt like I wrote this one more for me. I needed a place to remember, to document, to come back to, to continue to give me perspective on how intentional and generous the Lord is. As I am typing this, I’m sitting on my porch, the sun is setting causing the sky to change an array of colors as it stretches across the river while 20+ kids are running around my front yard playing, laughing...and I have the sweetest peace that I haven’t felt all week and for that I am thankful.
It's no wonder why the Bible tells us hundreds of times to remember all the Lord has done. It is in remembering that we are filled once again with the awe, intentionality, grace of the our Heavenly Father. Our good, good Father.
“I give thanks to you, O Lord my God, with my whole heart, and I will glorify your name forever. For great is your steadfast love toward me”
PSALM 86:12-13